How to tell someone they aren’t the brightest bulb in the pack

These are one-liners that you really don’t want people to be using to describe you. I think it’s nicer to use these though instead of saying that someone is just unintelligent. If they aren’t intelligent though, they may not understand what you’re saying about them. If they’re the type to seek revenge that may just be to your benefit. We talked about these this morning and the response was overwhelming…

 Not the brightest light in the harbor.

The light’s on but no one’s home.

 Not the brightest bulb in the box.

 A few screws short of a hardware store.

 Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

 A few cards short of a deck.

 A few fries short of a Happy Meal.

 About as sharp as a marble.

 Only has one oar in the water.

 Smart as a bag of rocks.

 A burger short of a combo meal.

 The elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor.

 A few peas short of a casserole.

 A few keys short of a keyboard.

 Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree.

 Dumber than a bag of hammers.

A few bricks short of a full load.

 A few clowns short of a circus.

 A few beers short of a six-pack.

 Dumber than a box of hair.

 A few tacos short of a fiesta platter.

 All foam no beer.

 As smart as bait.

 Chimney’s clogged.

 Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash.

 Forgot to pay his brain bill.

The antenna doesn’t pick up all the channels.

 His belt doesn’t go through all the loops.

 Another brain would be lonely.

 Missing a few buttons on his remote control.

 No grain in the silo.

 Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.

 Receiver is off the hook.

Thank you for all the awesome e-mails these are just some of the ones you sent in.
Click on “Leave a reply” with any additional lines you may have too!

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